Where is Step 3 in the Big Book?

Being convinced , we were at Step Three , which is that we decided to turn our will and our life over to God as we understood Him . Just what do we mean by that , and just what do we do ?

The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self – will can hardly be a success . On that basis we are almost always in collision with something or somebody , even though our motives are good . Most people try to live by self – propulsion . Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show ; is forever trying to arrange the lights , the ballet , the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way . If his arrangements would only stay put , if only people would do as he wished , the show would be great . Everybody , including himself , would be pleased . Life would be wonderful . In trying to make these arrangements our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous . He may be kind , considerate , patient , generous ; even modest and self – sacrificing . On the other hand , he may be mean , egotistical , selfish and dishonest . But , as with most humans , he is more likely to have varied traits .

What usually happens ? The show doesn’t come off very well . He begins to think life doesn’t treat him right . He decides to exert himself more . He becomes , on the next occasion , still more demanding or gracious , as the case may be . Still the play does not suit him . Admitting he may be somewhat at fault , he is sure that other people are more to blame . He becomes angry , indignant , self – pitying . What is his basic trouble ? Is he not really a self – seeker even when trying to be kind ? Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well ? Is it not evident to all the rest of the players that these are the things he wants ? And do not his actions make each of them wish to retaliate , snatching all they can get out of the show? Is he not , even in his best moments , a producer of confusion rather than harmony ?

Our actor is self – centered , ego – centric , as people like to call it nowadays . He is like the retired business man who lolls in the Florida sunshine in the winter complaining of the sad state of the nation ; the minister who sighs over the sins of the twentieth century ; politicians and reformers who are sure all would be Utopia if the rest of the world would only behave ; the outlaw safe cracker who thinks society has wronged him ; and the alcoholic who has lost all and is locked up . Whatever our protestations , are not most of us concerned with ourselves , our resentments , or our self – pity ?

Selfishness , self – centeredness ! That , we think , is the root of our troubles . Driven by a hundred forms of fear , self – delusion , self – seeking , and self – pity , we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate . Sometimes they hurt us , seemingly without provocation , but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt .

So our troubles , we think , are basically of our own making . They arise out of ourselves , and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self – will run riot , though he usually doesn’t think so . Above everything , we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness . We must , or it kill us ! God makes that possible . And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid . Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore , but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to . Neither could we reduce our self – centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power . We had to have God’s help .

This is the how and the why of it . First of all , we had to quit playing God . It didn’t work . Next , we decided that hereafter in this drama of life , God was going to be our Director . He is the Principal ; we are His agents . He is the Father , and we are His children . Most Good ideas are simple , and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom .

When we sincerely took such a position , all sorts of remarkable things followed . We had a new Employer . Being all powerful , He provided what we needed , if we kept close to Him and performed His work well . Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves , our own little plans and designs . More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life . As we felt new power flow in , as we enjoyed peace of mind , as we discovered we could face life successfully , as we became conscious of His presence , we began to lose our fear of today , tomorrow or the hereafter . We were reborn .

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is one of the oldest organizations that offer addiction treatment. Their 12 Step method gives those struggling with alcohol addiction a roadmap to recovery, often by encouraging them to acknowledge their addiction and to work towards sobriety. Step 3 of the 12 Steps focuses on encouraging one to acknowledge what they can and cannot control, and to seek help when needed.

What is Step 3 of Alcoholics Anonymous?

Alcoholics Anonymous Step 3 encourages those to make,  “a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him.” Some may initially have a hard time with this step, largely due to the way it is worded. Those who do not believe in god or having conflicting feelings of religion may initially shy away from Step 3. However, this step isn’t meant to be a religious obligation. Instead, Step 3 is meant to help people rely on something other than themselves to help them abstain from drinking alcohol. This can mean seeking help from friends, family, licensed professionals, religious beliefs, or anything that can help one ground themselves and work towards sobriety.

Understanding Step 3 of Alcoholics Anonymous

Step 3 of Alcoholics Anonymous can be one of the most difficult to grasp. It’s important to understand this step in context. Step 3 is the third of three steps meant to help one give up the illusion that he is in control of his drinking. Many who struggle with alcohol addiction often believe that they can control how much they drink or how they behave while drunk. In a sense, they may deny that they have a problem. The first three steps of Alcoholics Anonymous gradually help shift the one’s thinking about their drinking. First, one must admit that they have a problem – that they don’t have the personal power to stop drinking. Then, they must come to terms with the idea of seeking a higher power to help them live a better life. In Alcoholics Anonymous, the higher power doesn’t have to be God, although many people interpret higher power to mean God. It can be anything that sparks an inspiration to achieve a sober life. Then and only then can one turn over their will and life to the care of this higher power.

Where is Step 3 in the Big Book?

 

Ways to Follow Step 3 of AA

Begin distinguishing between what is in their control and what isn’t.

Those struggling with alcohol addiction often cover up feelings of being out of control by attempting to control everything in their lives, including their own drinking. Some drink to forget that other painful things in their lives are beyond their control. One way to use Step 3 is to consider if you have truly have the power to control certain aspects of your life, such as your drinking. Learning to let go of things that are beyond their control may help some to reduce their desire to drink.

Cultivate a positive attitude.

The feelings behind alcohol addiction are usually painful; often, those struggling with alcohol addiction feel they can’t deal with pain, anger or frustration. As a result, many may turn to drinking as a coping mechanism to relieve themselves of these feelings. By learning to turn over these feelings to some sort of higher power, people may begin feeling more capable of dealing with life’s challenges, which can help alleviate the compulsion to drink.

Being more open to guidance.

Many find it difficult to accept help because of their need for control. Those struggling with alcohol addiction sometimes spend energy resisting therapists or counselors’ suggestions instead of making changes in their lives. Step 3 suggests that one should instead be open to help from whatever source it comes.

Getting Help for Alcohol Addiction

Help for alcohol addiction is easy to find, but it is not always easy to ask for. Overcoming an addiction to or a dependency on alcohol can be a long and sometimes frustrating process, but if you’ve made the decision to stop drinking you’ve crossed the most important hurdle in your recovery.

If you’re ready to get help with alcohol addiction, visit the AA website to find a support group near you. There are also many secular programs and alternatives to AA that may help you achieve or maintain recovery.

What chapter is step 3 in big book?

According to Chapter 5 of the Big Book, Step 3 includes this – “we decided to turn our will and our life over to God as we understood Him.” When first starting to live a recovering lifestyle, most people don't quite understand what this means.

Where are the steps listed in the Big Book?

These 12 steps are outlined in Chapter 5, “How It Works,” of the Big Book. The 12 Steps helped each of the co-founders of AA in their own recovery from alcohol misuse and have continued to help countless others battle their alcohol addictions.

What chapter is step 4 in the Big Book?

FOURTH STEP INVENTORY: PEOPLE WE HAVE HARMED Big Book, page 70, paragraph 3 “We have listed the people we have hurt by our conduct, and are willing to straighten out the past if we can.”

What is AA 3rd step?

Instead, Step 3 is meant to help people rely on something other than themselves to help them abstain from drinking alcohol. This can mean seeking help from friends, family, licensed professionals, religious beliefs, or anything that can help one ground themselves and work towards sobriety.