We broke up became friends got back together Reddit

I dated a guy in high school, but I was really confused about my sexuality, and he had hangups about what dating a girl meant (shy and put girls on a bit of a pedestal), so between the two of those things, I broke it off with him. He still crushed on me hard though, and we tried to be friends. For the most part it worked out. I dated a girl for a while, but when we broke up (exact tale is on Reddit somewhere) he developed stronger feelings for me again. He didn't ask me out, though, he was afraid of hurting me since I was not in a good place mentally.

Unfortunately, an abusive guy got his claws in me, and part way through that relationship I was not allowed to have any contact with my ex anymore. When that relationship finally ended (the abusive jerk left me and our daughter), I slowly got into contact with my old friends again, including my ex. We reaffirmed our friendship -- he didn't know the whole story and was angry with me, but once he knew he felt bad and wanted to earnestly become friends -- and we texted most days.

One day we were talking and I said the one thing I missed was sex and he said, "Hey you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours."

Apparently he was really surprised when I replied, "Okay." (He was a virgin).

So we developed a FWB relationship that a few months later developed into something more.

We'll have been dating for three months years* next February. We plan on eventually moving in together and looking to get engaged if it goes well. He and my daughter adore each other, and even though he's not daddy yet, he recently said he loves her like his own. With my daughter's bio dad out of the picture anyways, he's the closest thing she has to a dad right now.

He is the best guy ever. We both really needed to grow up and experience things. I needed to realize that he's the type of guy I really wanted and needed, not the type of guy I thought I wanted like my abusive ex. We have enough in common to be compatible yet different enough to keep things interesting. We have a solid past that wasn't traumatic (aside from me breaking up with him for a girl, but that was worked out a long time ago), so we have very positive view of each other. We have some friends in common but enough to have personal space. We both agreed at this point that of we were to break up, it would likely be civil, because we have very good communication and aren't afraid to talk to one another even with difficult subjects.

He seriously is awesome. I told him when I first dumped him that he would make a lucky woman very happy one day. And I am very happy with him. It just took some time for us to get where we needed to be.

*edit: Boyfriend may be a Time Lord but he does not have a TARDIS so yeah its been almost three years not three months. Sorry.

has anyone ever succeeded to get back in a relationship after a break up re-starting again as "friends"?

Keeping my story short, I decided to break up from my ex bf because I was suffering depression and I was becoming co-dependant from him. Since then I have started to work a lot on myself and I now I feel much much better. I have also realized that I don't need him in my life to be happy, and I am sure I will be able to find someone else in my future if we don't get back together.

However I think I keep on loving him, and I think he could be the one. The main issue is that he has always had difficulties in expressing his feelings (also when we were together and in all his previous relationships). After the breakup, he told me that in this moment he is not able to be really close to anyone, so he doesn't want to be in a relationship.

I managed the first moments after the breakup not in a good way: instead than keeping distance immediately, we kept on hanging out like "friends" and I got clingy and annoying (I know I was the one who broke up, but I was feeling like he wasn't caring at all and this was indifferent for him).

At a certain point, I re-acquired my dignity and I started to go no contact. Before no contact I was the one who was always starting the conversation with him. After no contact he started to re-appear. We arranged to meet one day recently for a catch-up and we had a nice time. Nobody talked about the relationship or how we expect to behave in the future. Probably I see what is only in my mind but when he was speaking to me, for more than one time his eyes were deeply looking at me (you know, when you look at someone you are interested in and they shine?). And at the end he wanted to give me a hug, which was quite intense. Also I texted telling him I had a nice time and he replied he had the same. Obviously all signs do not mean really anything, especially cause he didn't mention at all he would like to give another go to us. Probably he considers me only as a friend (or a sort of friend).

But I don't wanna surrender. I know I probably sound very stupid and stubborn, but I am sure that after 4 months he keeps on having feelings for me. I also know that these things require time. I am not in a rush to get back together. I want to leave him space and keep on living my life and doing my experiences also without him.

I just want to know if anyone has ever lived this situation. Any experience, positive or negative, will be useful for me.

Can you be friends with your ex and then get back together?

Can you be friends with an ex if you still have feelings for them?

How long after a breakup can you be friends?

Is being friends with your ex a red flag?