If you’re a man over 35, and you’re into younger women, listen to me, a younger woman: Do not change your age in your Tinder bio. If you do, you’re going to miss out on all the wonderful people who want you for who you are. Which is to say, a hot daddy. Show Using the term “daddy” right now understandably makes some people uncomfortable. Given the reports flooding the news about once-beloved actors like Kevin Spacey assaulting minors, it’s a delicate time to discuss age play. But it’s also an important time, because understanding the distinction between consensual kinks and sexual assault and harassment is crucial. I’m a survivor myself and shudder with PTSD whenever my timeline is flooded with sexual abuse reports. Rape is not sex. What I’m talking about here is a form of sexual play in which two consenting adults enjoy light role-playing by integrating the word “daddy” into their sex lives. Recently, I was at dinner with a male friend of mine. He’s 37, extremely attractive, successful, and kind—basically a dreamboat. Any girl woman would be thrilled to match with him on Tinder. We were catching up on our dating lives, and I was shocked and dismayed when he revealed that he lies about his age in his Tinder bio. He keeps it at 35, he said, rather than 37, under the assumption that many women cap their search preferences at 35. He didn’t want to narrow the playing field, especially because he often dates women younger than him. Watch Now: Kurt Russell's Most Dangerous Stunts As a woman in her late 20s, I found it ironic that he was worried about women capping off their search preferences at 35: When it comes to cis-gendered straight dues, 35 is the youngest my Tinder settings are set to. Do I have daddy issues? Oh, for sure. Am I a submissive who thinks it’s hot to date a daddy? Abso-fucking-lutely. I have certainly dated and developed feelings for men my own age, and also those younger than me, but those were all people whom I met in real life. I got to know them in person and was able to feel out if they were mature enough for my tastes. On Tinder my type is totally different. Judge me all you want for my 35-45 age range—I suppose I deserve the same condemnation as a man who tailors his search preferences towards younger women—but they do say men mature at a slower rate than women, and after one too many literal “u up?” messages from 20-something dudes in Brooklyn, I had to try a new approach. A 41-year-old has also messaged me “u up?” but I digress. The point is: When you lie about your age, you are missing out on the many younger women who are not only totally fine with how old you are, but who actually get off on it. And those are precisely who you want to be attracting. There’s nothing more beautiful in dating than meeting someone who is both kink-compatible with you and fun to spend time with. And after a few dates with the hot 25-year-old, you’re going to have to come clean about your actual age anyway. Lying is a shitty foundation on which to build a relationship, no matter how serious. Sure, there’s a case to be made for telling white lies in exchange for giving people a chance to get to know you based on you, rather than a number. Ageism is alive and well, but you’re only making it worse by lowering your age on dating apps. I’ve given this a lot of thought as my 30th birthday approaches. I’m certain that I will indeed, be filtered out of certain men’s Tinder criteria. But...thank god? Someone who can’t handle dating a woman in her 30s is someone who can’t handle financial stability, emotional maturity, and a few more years of experience doing mouth stuff. Likewise, a younger woman who isn’t interested in dating someone over 35 is not only entitled to that preference, but may not get off on or appreciate all the delightful qualities you bring to the table, such as your own apartment, money to pay for dinner and cabs, and the daddy title with the oral finesse to back it up.
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Based in New Zealand, I am a songwriter, writer and a bit of an autodidact. I'm also passionate about meditation, philosophy, spirituality, culture, social issues, and learning through experience. Always keen to collaborate, and looking for musical projects as well as opportunities to write and exchange stories and wisdom with others. I'd call myself a humanist rather than just vegan, as I believe our global well-being is more important to focus on than ever before. Related PostsThis site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. Is it wrong to lie about your age on Tinder?It is not illegal to lie about your age on an online dating app such as Tinder or eHarmony. However, in misrepresenting your age, you will have violated the Terms of Service of those respective apps. If you're found out, you could face removal from their service or even a lifetime ban.
Is it OK to lie about your age on a dating site?When it comes to online dating, lying about age can benefit you - provided you do it within reason. Here's why: Studies have shown women are more comfortable with round numbers, so they're much more likely to search ages "30-40" than 32-42. Sometimes it makes sense to adjust your age accordingly.
How often do people lie about age on Tinder?How Often Do People Lie About Their Age On Dating Apps? I would ballpark it at around 3-5% depending on your ability to screen profiles and read people. The older you get, and the closer you approach round numbers like 40. 50 and 60, the more likely someone will lie about their age.
Can I use Tinder at 17?The app has two separate communities – one for 18+ and one for younger teens aged 13-17. When you set up a profile, Tinder automatically takes information based on your Facebook profile, including photos, date of birth and sex.
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What happens if you lie about your age on Tinder?
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