What is the baby Jesus quote from Talladega Nights?

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby2006

Stars: Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Sacha Baron Cohen, Gary Cole
Genre: Action, Comedy, Sport
Rating: PG-13
Runtime: 108 minutes

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby is a 2006 film about the #1 NASCAR driver, who stays atop the heap thanks to a pact with his best friend and teammate. But when a French Formula One driver makes his way up the ladder, his talent and devot… more »

Ricky Bobby:
Dear Eight Pound, Six Ounce, Newborn Baby Jesus, in your golden, fleece diapers, with your curled-up, fat, balled-up little fists pawin' at the air...

Chip:
He was a man! He had a beard!

Ricky Bobby:
I like the baby version the best, do you hear me?! I win the races and I get the money! I work too hard for your bull, Chip.

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Jesus is mentioned in the movie a few times in hilarious ways. Here are some Talladega Nights quotes about Jesus

• “I like to think of Jesus like with giant eagle's wings, and singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an angel band and I'm in the front row and I'm hammered drunk!” — Cal Naughton, Jr.,

• “I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life.” — Cal Naughton, Jr.

• “I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo T-shirt because it says I want to be formal, but I'm here to party.” — Cal Naughton, Jr.

• "Dear 8 pounds 6 ounces... newborn infant Jesus, don't even know a word yet." - Ricky Bobby

• "Dear Lord Baby Jesus, I want to thank you for this wonderful meal, my two beautiful sons, Walker and Texas Ranger, and my red-hot smokin' wife, Carley." - Ricky Bobby

• "Help me, Jesus! Help me Jewish God! Help me, Allah! AAAAAHHH! Help me Tom Cruise! Tom Cruise, use your witchcraft on me to get the fire off me!" - Ricky Bobby

• "Dear Lord baby Jesus, lyin' there in your ghost manger, just lookin' at your Baby Einstein developmental videos, learnin' 'bout shapes and colors. I would like to thank you for bringin' me and my mama together, and also that my kids no longer sound like retarded gang-bangers." - Ricky Bobby

• "Dear tiny Jesus, in your golden fleeced diapers with your tiny little fat balled up fists. – Ricky Bobby

• Cal Naughton, Jr.: "I had a dream where Jesus was a dirty old bum, and I was about to sock him in the face because, well he's a dirty old bum, but then I thought, there's something special about him..."
  Ricky Bobby: "Because it was Jesus, right..."
  Cal Naughton, Jr.: "Yeah..."
  

• "Dear Lord Baby Jesus, or as our brothers to the south call you, Jesús, we thank you so much for this bountiful harvest of Domino’s, KFC, and the always delicious Taco Bell. I just want to take time to say thank you for my family, my two beautiful, beautiful, handsome, striking sons, Walker and Texas Ranger, or T.R. as we call him, and of course, my red-hot smoking wife, Carly who is a stone-cold fox." – Ricky Bobby

• "Dear Lord Baby Jesus, we also thank you for my wife's father Chip. We hope that you can use your Baby Jesus powers to heal him and his horrible leg. It smells terrible and the dogs are always botherin' with it." – Ricky Bobby

• "Hey, um... you know, sweetie, Jesus did grow up. You don't always have to call him baby. It's a bit odd and off puttin' to pray to a baby." - Carley

• "Well, look, I like the Christmas Jesus best when I'm sayin' grace. When you say grace, you can say it to Grown-up Jesus, or Teenage Jesus, or Bearded Jesus, or whoever you want." - Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights Kid Quotes

Walker Bobby and Texas Ranger are Ricky's sons. Down here are some Talladega Nights quotes by Walker and Texas Ranger.

• "I threw a bunch of Grandpa Chip's war medals off the bridge." - Walker

• "The teacher asked me what was the capital of North Carolina. I said Washington, D.C." - Texas Ranger

• "She said, 'No, you're wrong.' I said, 'You got a lumpy butt.' She got mad at me and yelled at me and I pissed in my pants and I never did change my pee-pants all day. I'm still sittin' in my dirty pee-pants." - Texas Ranger

• “Shut those mutts up before I cook 'em and eat 'em!” — Texas Ranger Bobby

• “My friends and I skipped school and we filled up a cup of pee and tried to get our neighbor's dog to drink it. But he wouldn't.” — Walker Bobby

• "Shut up, Chip or I'll go ape-shit on your ass!" - Walker

• "I'm gonna scissor-kick you in the back of the head!" - Texas Ranger

• "I'm ten years old, but I'll beat your ass!" - Walker

• "Chip, I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey!" - Texas Ranger

• "Greatest Generation my ass. Tom Brokaw's a punk!" - Walker

• "Chip, I'm all jacked up on Mountain Dew!" - Texas Ranger

• "Shut up in here! I'm trying to sleep!" - Walker

• "One of you turds is about to get smacked in the mouth!" - Texas Ranger

• "Someone didn't love you enough when you were little, did they?" - Texas Ranger

• Walker : (the boys are running around when they should be in Sunday school) "ANARCHY! ANARCHY!"
  Texas Ranger: "I don't know what that means, but I LOVE it!"
  

• "You look old, Granny are you gonna die today?" - Texas Ranger

• "Please let us not resolve our problems with fighting." - Texas Ranger

• "Aw, Grandma, not my prison shank!" - Texas Ranger

• "Why, if it isn't our mangy, transient grandfather." - Texas Ranger

• “Daddy, you made that grace your b*tch.” — Walker

Those are 99 hilarious Talladega Nights quotes by some funny characters in the movie.

Even though this is an adult comedy movie, Talladega Nights teaches you about how hard it is to be number one. But, it can be easier if you have loyal friends and family around to support you.

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