 If the response is what you were looking for — great! If it’s not, it’s still important to let someone know how you feel. Here’s why: Show 1. It sets you free. Even if the answer is not what you wanted, it sets you free from the questions, from the assumptions, from reading too much into things, from holding on to what ifs, from waiting for that text, or that kiss or that moment. It sets you free from your own expectations. 2. It’s easier to move on. It’s easier to get back to the routine of your single life. You feel better about going out or even dating other people without feeling bad that you might be disrespecting anyone’s feelings. You know now that you are totally available. 3. It prevents you from being strung along. If you were getting attached, it’s always better to say it sooner than later before you get more attached that it becomes harder to move on. You don’t want to be strung along for a long time only to find out that it’s going nowhere. 4. You deserve an answer. You deserve to know what’s going on, you owe it to yourself to know where you stand, and you deserve to ask questions without holding back because you deserve an answer – whatever it may be. 5. They deserve an explanation. They deserve to know too why you were acting weird or distant or why you were holding back and they deserve to know why you might not be the same if the answer is not what you wanted. If you care about them, they deserve to know the truth. 6. Life is too short to leave important words unsaid. You never know what tomorrow may bring or when you will see that person again. It’s liberating to know that you left this person saying everything you wanted to say instead of beating yourself up for letting them go without telling them what they really meant to you. 7. It’s brave. It’s brave to risk getting rejected and it’s brave to tell someone how you feel when you’re unsure of the answer. It’s also brave because you’re not afraid to ask for what you want and you are strong enough to handle the consequences. It shows that you are both strong and mature. 8. It means you love yourself. When you want to understand what’s happening and where things are going, it means you have standards and it means that you respect yourself to walk away instead of getting played or staying in the friend zone when you want more. 9. It feels great. It feels great to get it off your chest and tell someone you like them and you think they’re great, it feels great for them also, to know that they are liked and appreciated. Regardless of how they feel, everyone wants to hear that they are special. Consider it your good deed of the day. 10. You get your own closure. You don’t wait until things fizzle out or until you two slowly drift apart, you get to know while it’s fresh, when it’s happening, instead of wondering what went wrong months down the line.
In our culture, we are all about "playing it cool." Remaining aloof. Being "safe" and not risking looking silly, vulnerable, or god forbid, actually being real. Instead, we pretend not to care so much. We act like its "no big deal" when actually, it is. We say, "eh, what can you do?" In order to brush off a disappointment or hurt, to pretend we are over it and dismiss such. When actually, there may be a lot one can do about it, from speaking up to attempting some action, or even just facing the moving through the grief. People also downplay their feelings for the people in their lives, with regards to speaking about such. Not wanting to risk rejection, feeling embarrassed, or place oneself "too out in the open." So instead, we retreat to the shelter of façade. Pretend. Of hiding behind walls of guardedness. Why is this a major loss? For many reasons. Sure, its "safer." But ultimately, its a way of half loving. And even, of half living. First off, lets briefly explore in a bit more depth why people do not say what is truly in their hearts to one another. --Our culture strongly reinforcing the message that aloof is better, "stronger," and cooler, while being open and honest is "weak," and uncool. --Risk. Opening up and
spilling ones heart does entail some risk. Risk of rejection, risk of the person to whom you are expressing such not responding in kind, risk of change in perception between the two people, etc. (Though the actual risks are minor, when compared with all that you have to gain here). Our culture is all about being independent. One man islands, if you will. The idea of "not needing anyone else," and being able to handle it all on ones own. Being "cool" and aloof, which we equate with being "strong" and able bodied. Since when is wanting closeness with others synonymous with weakness? That is a sad and strange concept to me, that this has been twisted into such. In fact, the desire for love, closeness and connection with others is a basic human want and even a need. Yes, a need. Its a human thing. Therefore, this has nothing to do with strength or weakness. I'm not sure how it got turned into being such, but that's unfortunate and inaccurate. What these misperceptions do, much to many peoples detriment, ultimately is separate people. Disconnect them from one another. Prevent further closeness from flourishing. Holding back also leaves much room for regret, for wishing one had told a person what they felt when they had the chance. Playing ones emotional cards close to the chest also leaves others close to them wondering and unsure. It adds uncertainty and sometimes even unease to the relationship, which can potentially add to disconnection between two people. All in all, it just halts the moving closer to one another in any relationship- platonic or romantic. Imagine how you yourself feel if/when someone you care about, have feelings for, love, like immensely, respect, any or all of the above, says something awesome, complimentary, and real to you. It could be anything positive but to offer a few potential examples: -"you're special to me." Of course, the possibilities are endless. Essentially, its not about just delivering a line but about saying how you really feel for the person, whatever is inside of your heart, whatever it might be. Finding the courage though, to actually say it. Why is this so important? Expression of affection builds bridges. It warms hearts. It can even change lives. These can be
some of the most emotionally moving, heart rending, most marvelous parts of being human. Some of the most memorable moments of our lives can be hearing something true, meaningful and awesome that someone has decided to say to us. So why not tell those in your life what you feel for them? What they mean to you. How they have added to your life. Something you love or admire about them. What you have learned from them. How their being a part of your life may have changed it. That you like someone deeply, or maybe even love them. Dare to express your affections. These are some of the most integral building blocks of love and close relationships. Being honest and vulnerable is about as brave, beautiful, awe inspiring and stellar as it gets. Its the opposite of weak. Its easier to hide behind walls. Its harder to speak up. To swallow the lump in your throat and take the risk. Therefore, being vulnerable, open and honest is the far more difficult, braver and ultimate stronger action. Vulnerability is beautiful. Your words can stir hearts, change lives, become some of a persons most memorable moments. Ones they will cherish and recall as some of their own life's most awesome treasures. Dare to be honest. Say what you feel. To be real, and yes, vulnerable. You'll see, both in watching the other person alight at your genuine words, as well as in feeling your own heart swell in the moments when others dare to do the same with you. Want to make your life far richer and emotionally fulfilling? Speak up. In the words of John Mayer, "you better know that in the end, its better to say too much, then to never say what you need to say. Say what you need to say." Is it good to tell people how you feel?It feels great to get it off your chest and tell someone you like them and you think they're great, it feels great for them also, to know that they are liked and appreciated. Regardless of how they feel, everyone wants to hear that they are special. Consider it your good deed of the day.
Why is it important to talk about your feelings in a relationship?Trusting one another and feeling comfortable expressing our feelings is an important part of a healthy relationship. Emotion is an integral part of being human, and expressing feelings appropriately can deepen and strengthen the relationship you have with your partner or spouse.
Is it better to tell someone how you feel in person or text?“There is no single right way to go about telling someone how you feel." If you'd rather write them a text or send them a snap, then go that route. Just keep in mind that it's easier to make sure things are taken the way you intend (or to know if they aren't) when you communicate in person.
Why does it feel good to tell someone you love?“It's the oxygen for the relationship,” says FIU psychologist Lisa Arango. “Telling somebody you love them feeds the relationship, keeps it alive.” It reinforces your feelings and helps remind your loved ones – whether your spouse, sweetheart, child or parent – that you are there for them and that they matter to you.
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Why is it important to tell people how you feel?
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