How to Win friends and influence people Reddit

A lot of the times when you see people asking for advice on getting friends and a social life, this book is recommended. It would make sense too, because that's exactly what the title is promising, right? I picked up a copy the other day, and I started to get some serious doubts to the legitimacy of the book immediately. The first 30 pages are nothing but comments on how great of a book it is, and self-promotion by the author. This made me realise that I had not heard a single person criticise the book, which to me is a major red flag.

I'd like to ask anyone who has read the book what their take on it is. If any of the advice in the book has helped you in any way, please tell me. And everything you would dislike about the book is also worthwhile, though it's easy to get absolutist. If just ANY advice offered in the book is good, I will at least read that part

Thanks in advance to anyone who read through to this part and who would leave a comment. All opinions are appreciated.

I've recently read the book myself and I plan to read it again. There are practical limitations, and it isn't a be all end all guide to solving human beings, but as a guide book in basic human relations it's incredible.

While reading it, I attempted to try some of the simpler tricks in my daily life (mostly on work colleagues and randoms) and I got positive results. For instance: just smiling at people, even if you don't mean it, improves most peoples' disposition towards you. And listening to people talk about themselves is just a life hack. I found that when meeting a new person, just listening attentively as they talk about themselves with an occasional prompt can get them to assume that you're a nice person. I found that even usually shy people will talk about themselves if you give them sincere attention.

I've had more trouble applying some of the later lessons in the book. For instance: I've found that some people have disliked me for pointing out theirs mistakes even indirectly or when letting them save face (the book is right though. Most people really hate criticism).

All in all, I've found that the book has taught me some basic fundamentals, some of which I've applied right away and most of which I'll need more practice, maybe after a second reading. For maximum benefit, I suggest trying one lesson at a time. The book your turn you into a mind controller but human relations is a skill that's applicable to almost any walk of life.

Had a few Dale Carnegie courses in my early 30s. I was in sales and my company sent me, it helped polish a poor kid from a factory town and made a huge difference. My oldest son had some public speaking hiccups during his college internship and I sugested he take Dale's speaking course, he'll tell u it was one of the most important things he did. Talk about timeless, this infographic is from his book "How to win friends and influence People" written in the mid 1930s.

Hey all!

I recently read How To Win Friends Influence People and man, it doesn't skip a BEAT. I've read a lot of self help books and all of them follow a similar pattern of "overly simplistic argument is made and then dude explains why his method is right for the whole book". With Dale Carnegie's book, I feel like he never drags the reader into that territory. He explained what his method was and gave 2-3 good examples on how to do them in the real world. Boom. Done. Next chapter. I wish more self help books did this like STOP WAISTING MY TIME MAN.

Anyway 10/10 book if you guys have any other books that are all killer and no filler I'd love to check those out too :)

Posted byu/[deleted]8 years ago

I haven't yet finished it, I know, seems better if you read it then recommend it, however, I'm a quarter of the way through it. And it is a fantastic book. So far, it has changed how I look at acting towards other people (especially since I'm a major ass hole), and gives a slight in site on psychology on how people are. Just riddled with tons of great lessons. And surprisingly it is a smooth and easy read that is actually a age turner which I never would have suspected. Anyways, I highly recommend it for anyone.

Im currently reading this book, and the book itself is quite an enjoyable read. However, it was released i think in 1938. Society and people changed and i feel like science and psychology knows nowadays much better. Im not done yet with that book, but it leaves a weird feeling to me.

For example, it says that you shouldnt critize other people and just shut up when you find something negative about them, but isnt it important to point out others people mistake, in a polite and calm manner that is? I dont think you can grow that much as a person without constructive critic from your surrounding. It just seems to me that this book wants to turn you into a people pleaser, with no dignity whatsoever.

Id love to hear your opinion on this. Especially what you think todays science would say about Carnegies infamous self-help book.