Why is my cat just staring at me

Living in a home with cats might sometimes feel like you're under surveillance. Their eyes follow you whether you're in bed, making dinner, working from your kitchen-table-turned-office-desk, and even when you're on the toilet. But what does this fixation mean? Are they gazing lovingly at you, their favorite human? Or are they plotting their next pounce?

Índice Show

Do I Look Tasty to You?
Are You the Boss?
Curiosity and Cat Behavior
Are You Planning World Domination?
Cause for Concern?

If you wake up to your cat staring at you while you sleep or catch him peering out at you from around the corner, here's what he could be trying to say.

RELATED: Why Do Cats' Eyes Glow in the Dark?

There are two types of kitty stares: a "hard stare" and a "soft stare," says Laura Cassiday, MS, CCBC, ABCCT. These mean totally different things, but don't stress about misinterpreting what your cat is communicating—the two stares look nothing alike.

If your cat is staring at you with his tail up and ears forward-facing, this is content body language, Cassiday says, and he most likely wants something from you. He might be trying to warn you that his food bowl is dangerously close to being empty, or he might be asking for chin scritches and playtime with his favorite toy.

"If [it's] a 'soft stare,' reward your kitty by giving him what he wants," Cassiday says. "He's asking politely!"

While you can appease a soft-staring cat with treats or pats, a hard stare is something you definitely need to pay attention to. A hard stare means your cat is afraid or feeling threatened, and it looks very different from a happy staring cat.

In addition to staring, Cassiday says a cat that's scared of you will also:

Have his ears facing back
Hold his tail tight around his body or facing down and possibly twitching
Be tense
Have dilated pupils
Is hissing, growling, or licking his lips
Isn't blinking and continues to stay focused on you

This all depends on whether your cat is staring at you happily or fearfully. When you notice a hard stare, Cassiday says it's important to figure out what you're doing that might be causing kitty to be upset.

"Stay still and be boring, and slowly get up and walk away if you are able," she says. "Cats should not be punished for this behavior, as they are just trying to communicate that they are uncomfortable."

On the other hand (or should we say paw?), Cassiday says happy cats are usually pretty comfortable with soft eye contact with people. So if you find your cat soft staring at you from across the room, you can match that kitty's stare—especially if you throw in some slow blinks.

"Slow blinks are like 'kitty kisses.' They are signs of affection because they indicate that the cat trusts you enough to close his eyes around you," Cassiday says. "I like to slow blink back at cats, or I may do it first if it's an unfamiliar cat that seems nervous around me. It's a good way to communicate, 'I am not a threat.'"

For some, simply knowing that cats stare at people isn’t enough to dismiss it. Indeed, it can be deeply unsettling to be the target of intense feline focus.

While a staring contest with your cat might be the perfect pandemic activity, it still doesn’t explain why they do it. Cat behavior is often puzzling, but we think we might have a few ideas to explain this particularly odd conduct of kitties.

Do I Look Tasty to You?

Cats are masters of non-verbal communication, although many individual felines can be incredibly “chatty” with their people. To understand your cat’s thoughts, evaluate their body language.

What is the position of their tail (up, down, fluffed out, whipping around)?
How are they holding their body (rigid, fluid-looking/relaxed, etc.)?
Are their ears perked upright or pinned back towards the head?

Once you put their staring into the context of their overall appearance you can learn more about how their surroundings impact their emotional state.

Are You the Boss?

Cats are highly territorial pets and enjoy feeling like everything belongs to them. To that end, you might get a little extra eye contact for just being in “their” space.

Among cats, extended eye contact is associated with dominance and even aggression. A visual connection is the starting point for most feline interactions and can determine whether or not they’re about to wrestle, fight or play.

Additionally, cats depend on their vision to catch prey. Unlike us, cats do not have to blink very often. This allows them to keep both eyes on their next meal. This could explain why this specific cat behavior helps them win staring contests with their owners.

Curiosity and Cat Behavior

By nature, cats want to know what’s happening – and when it’s going down. If you haven’t noticed the time for a while, chances are your cat knows it’s fast approaching their moment of kibble. No, they aren’t staring at you because you look meaty. They simply know that you’re about to do their bidding.

Are You Planning World Domination?

Cats are part of the family bond, even if it’s just the two of you. They love their owner(s) and feel dependent on them for security, comfort, play and food. Having a staring contest is just another way to affirm your bond. When you are calm, they are, too. They are constantly sizing you up to see how you’re feeling so they can react in kind.

Cause for Concern?

Sometimes strange cat behavior clues us into something that’s off. If you’re concerned about how your cat is acting or just want to be sure they’re okay, our team is always here for you at Harpeth Hills Animal Hospital.

Have you ever walked into a room to find your cat staring at you, or witnessed them watching you as you eat? Your cat is not challenging you to a staring contest but why is your cat staring at you?

There are a variety of reasons why a cat may be staring at you including trying to communicate with you, out of curiosity, expressing emotion, or waiting for a cue. The majority of the time, a cat’s stare is part of the processing of stimuli around them, as they constantly smell and sees and reacts accordingly.

Cats are naturally curious, so they’ll often stare at someone simply because they’re interested in what that person is doing.

Cats are naturally curious and since they are prey and predator animals, they always like to know what it is going on around. It could just be that they are observing you, maybe you just begun to move after sitting and they shift their focus to you due to the motion in the home.

Frequently, cats will stare at you because they believe that this will encourage you to do or give them something.

A cue is a signal that triggers a behavior. Cats are always learning, and we are teaching them even if we do not realize it. For example, when you take out the can opener when your first wake up, your cat comes running in anticipation of food. The cat has formed a positive association over time with the can opener and delicious breakfast, the can opener becomes a cue to come and stare at you.

Another common example is your cat may have stared at you in the past and when they stare at you, you have taken that as them asking to play, be pet, or be fed. They have learned that eye contact (staring) with you results in something they like and will continue to do it to get the same result (play, petting, food).

The more you reward this behavior over time, the more likely the cat will stare at you for what they want.

Cats will sometimes stare at you in order to communicate their feelings.

Most cat caregivers would love if their cats could talk to them and they do, but mostly using nonverbal communication. Staring is one of the many forms of nonverbal communication they use along with facial expressions, body posture, ears, whisker position, and more!

Also Read: What Your Cat’s Tail Can Tell You?

The important thing to remember is to look at the entire body of the cat – not just the eyes – and take note of the current context/situation in which the body language occurs. They use their body to show you when they’re feeling calm and relaxed, and when they’re feeling stressed out and anxious.

A relaxed cat has soft, open body language with natural breathing and a gentle appearance to the face.

A cat who is relaxed will have loose body movements and their breathing will be slow and steady. They may fold their feet in front of themselves or stretched way out in front.

A relaxed cat’s ears and whiskers will be at their neutral positions, or maybe slightly forward. The pupils will be thin slits and eyes would be almond shaped. They may have a half open or soft squinty, eye lightly closed or slow blinking along with a soft, relaxed body.

A slow blink indicates that your cat is feeling safe, happy, and is commonly used to express affection to humans and other cats.

In contrast to a relaxed cat, a cat who is staring fearfully will have a rigid appearance, with very wide eyes and generally tense body language.

A cat who is fearful and/or stressed will most likely freeze in place or run and hide. Their body will be tense and limbs and tail with be close to the body unlike with relaxed body language when limbs and tail are away from the body.

They may hold their legs underneath them in a crouched position. Their ears may be to the side or tucked back along with their tail. Their pupils will be dilated appearing big and round. They may be staring with direct eye contact usually in the direction of what is scaring them.

When your cat is exhibiting this body language, they are stressed and possibly scared and may exhibit aggressive behavior because of this. It is best to not pick up or touch your cat when they are exhibiting this body language and instead move what they are afraid of away from them (including humans) and toss some delicious treats to them or use the treats to lure them to a more comfortable place.

The best way to interpret your cat’s staring is to consider what nearby stimuli (including things humans might not be able to hear or see) could be a source of your cat’s attention, as well as to assess your cat’s body language for other clues to discover what they are trying to communicate.

Cats rarely blink normally, so their gaze may look unusually intense. A nervous or intent cat will not move while watching an object, and this stiff, alert body language combined with a lack of blinking can look creepy.

Generally, no. You can look back at your cat with a soft gaze, but directly staring into your cat's eyes could be perceived as aggressive and may make your cat uncomfortable.

It's not true that you should never look into a cat's eyes, but directly staring into your cat's eyes may appear aggressive to your cat. Softly or indirectly gazing at your cat, however, could signal comfort and trust.

Cats may watch you for a variety of reasons. Cats tend to be very cautious and aware of potential threats, so a wary cat may keep their eyes on something to avoid being surprised by any sudden movements. Your cat may also watch you out of curiosity. Pay attention to your cat's body language to determine whether they are feeling comfortable or nervous.

There are a variety of reasons why a cat may be staring at you including trying to communicate with you, out of curiosity, expressing emotion, or waiting for a cue.